"Starting a quarrel is like breaching a dam, so drop the matter before a dispute breaks out" (Proverbs 17:14, ESV). Below, I have created a list of eight church conflict causes. Awareness of these causes may help your church, church leadership, and members make strides to prevent or resolve conflicts. A goal is to "keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace" (Ephesians 4:3b, ESV).
1. Pride and Arrogance
When you feel that life is about you, you take issues personally. Self-centeredness leads to hurt feelings. James observed, "What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you?" (James 4:1, ESV). Get the focus off of yourself! Care about the needs of others.
When you have allowed pride to influence your relationships, admit your failure. The Bible says, "Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit but in humility count others more significant than yourselves" (Philippians 2:3, ESV). We prevent and resolve conflict when we live humbly.
2. Immaturity
Differences in perspective can broaden understanding. Mature people learn to disagree without being distressed and celebrate diversity in gifts and personalities. Mature people value different viewpoints. "Be infants in evil, but in your thinking be mature" (1 Corinthians 14:20b, ESV). We must learn to think, behave, and communicate with maturity—understanding that we benefit from the input of others.
3. Change and Inflexibility
Some resist change more than others. In times of change, one may benefit from being self-aware of emotional responses. Often change leads to feelings of powerlessness or insecurity because people tend to trust the continuity of the situation for security and peace instead of Jesus Christ. "The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe" (Proverbs 29:25, ESV). Only Jesus provides security in a changing world!
4. Unmet Needs
Money, space, supplies, calendar time, and opportunities are limited in supply. People disagree about priorities all the time. Different priorities may lead to conflict. "Let each of you look not only to his own interests but also to the interests of others" (Philippians 2:4, ESV). Churches prevent conflict when needs are considered, prioritized, and met judiciously.
5. Personality Politics
Factions in the church may intentionally or unintentionally engage in political maneuvering and posturing, leading to conflict. For example, older leaders may favor proven methods while younger leaders desire to change. Factions may attempt to increase their power and recruit others to their side. The Apostle Paul dealt with factions in the Corinthian church. "For when one says, 'I follow Paul,' and another, 'I follow Apollos,' are you not being merely human?" (1 Corinthians 3:3-4, ESV). One group in the Corinthian church claimed to be following only Christ. Paul identified these political factions in Corinth as selfish distractions from the mission of the church.
6. Unclear Responsibilities or Objectives
Conflicts arise among church leaders serving in confusing organizational structures. When lines of authority are unclear, people exercise control outside of the realms of their responsibility. Conflicts may become worse in times of crisis or transition. A biblical example of the lack of clarity and authority was during the transition between Kings Saul and David in Israel (1 Samuel 16-31). Challenging and complex relational difficulties erupted among those in authority and the citizens of Israel. Saul's pride, which led to his death, provided opportunities for David to prove his integrity amid the confusion (1 Samuel 31).
7. Injustice or Biases
Coach Barry Switzer said, "Some people are born on third base and go through life thinking they hit a triple." Various injustices may give rise to conflict. Leaders should probe the church to discover and address sources of injustice. Like automatic walkways in the airport, injustices can provide an advantage for some to walk on the fast track. Churches may knowingly or unknowingly grant favoritism to one type of individual or group over others. Paul expressed that the Gospel of Jesus Christ has broken down the walls that divide people. "There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus" (Galatians 3:28, ESV).
8. Poor Assimilation
The consequences of poor assimilation point to the importance of explaining what the church believes and how the church operates. Poor assimilation practices prove to be costly and lead to conflict. Furthermore, churches should train all leaders with skills to prevent and resolve conflict biblically.
Healthy Conflict Can Strengthen the Church
Healthy conflict and differing viewpoints may prove to be a source of creativity for the Great Commission church. Wise church leaders listen to different ideas and allow these differences to strengthen the mission of the church. "The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice" (Proverbs 12:15, ESV).
Let's learn to prevent and resolve conflict in the church biblically. The Apostle Paul said, "Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted" (Galatians 6:1, NIV).
Chris Crain-BMBA
