Daughter Is Upset Her Parents Only Listen To Her When They Need Money, So She Doesn’t Give Them Any Despite Them Being Homeless (2024)

Daughter Is Upset Her Parents Only Listen To Her When They Need Money, So She Doesn’t Give Them Any Despite Them Being Homeless (1)

Parenting, Relationships

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It’s a weird feeling to realize that your parents actually don’t know everything and that they can make mistakes with their decisions. When you are little, you rely on your parents to be guided through life and it seems that they have everything together and always know what the next step is.

You may go through your rebellious teenage stage, but when you grow up, you realize that your parents don’t have a clear understanding of how the world works and you may have more experience with it. Reddit user snd19i tried to explain to her parents that they were making poor financial decisions, but they ignored her and now are asking her to give them money, which she thinks she shouldn’t do.

More info: Reddit

Woman is tired of her parents spending money irresponsibly and is not willing to give them her own even though they are homeless

Image credits: James Abbott (not the actual photo)

The Original Poster (OP) is 27 years old and she isn’t living with her parents anymore and wouldn’t want to because they are that terrible with money. When she was little, her dad invested all of the family savings of $100k in penny stocks that he lost during the 2008 economic crisis. The family of three had to move into a bedroom, but that didn’t teach the parents a lesson.

The mom joined an MLM and, of course, she lost money. But that didn’t stop the parents from trying to take an illegal loan from the government just to be scammed by a broker that the daughter warned them about. She actually tried to take away the pen her dad was signing the contract with, but he screamed at her and just ignored all of the evidence she was providing them with.

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The OP’s parents made one bad financial decision after another that led the family to live together in just one bedroom

Image credits: snd19i

Now the parents are living in their car and don’t have money for even the cheapest apartments. They turned for help to their only daughter, who has $100k saved for her future home, and want some of that money.

The daughter has a good feeling that the parents will not know how to handle that money, so she is not lending them any of it. She also doesn’t want to let them move in with her because she lives with a roommate and they have a rule of allowing visitors for up to a week.

Although they are her parents, the OP finds it hard to feel sympathetic towards them because she did warn them about their bad decisions, but they didn’t listen and turned to her only when they needed money.

When the OP grew up, her parents got involved in a scam that left them homeless

Image credits: snd19i

The experience of not having a stable financial situation made the OP very aware of how much she spends and how important it is to save and invest smartly. She didn’t eat out and would wear the same clothes all the time. She doesn’t have a car, uses public transportation and shares an apartment with a roommate. At 27 years old, she has $100,000 in savings, but she had to sacrifice a lot not to end up like her parents.

She warned them and tried to stop them from losing their money, but they completely ignored her

Image credits: snd19i

Growing up poor and seeing your parents lose their home and a lot of money affects a person and how they will not only handle money when they grow up, but how they will behave in general because of their conception of control.

According to research published by the American Psychological Association, people who grew up poor tend to be more impulsive in uncertain situations and have a lower sense of control over their lives and their future.

This is also confirmed by a report by Sheehy-Skeffington and Jessica Rea that showed that “People living in poverty make decisions focused on coping with present stressful circ*mstances, often at the expense of future goals.”

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Now they are asking for money and a place to live, but the daughter thinks it was their fault that they ended up in this situation

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Image credits: snd19i

Image credits: Joe Green (not the actual photo)

Some people who escape poverty might be very careless with their money, like Rick Morton, who reveals in his book 100 Years of Dirt that he doesn’t count money any longer like his mother did because he doesn’t have to now that he receives a good salary; however, it leads to stupid decisions concerning money.

For the OP, growing up poor had an opposite effect. It may have to do with the fact that she ended up in such a situation because of her parents’ irresponsible financial decisions and she realized that spending money leads to not having it at all.

The woman admits that she was traumatized by the childhood she had and doesn’t want to perpetuate her parents’ bad spending habits. Do you think she should lend them some money so they can have a roof over their head instead of living in their car? Do you think they have the right to ask for it? Let us know your thoughts in the comments!

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People online agreed that her parents were grown adults who made bad decisions and didn’t listen to her when she tried to stop them, so she doesn’t owe them anything

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Daughter Is Upset Her Parents Only Listen To Her When They Need Money, So She Doesn’t Give Them Any Despite Them Being Homeless (2024)

FAQs

How do I help my homeless daughter? ›

Reassure your child that s/he is not to blame for being homeless or in a transitional living situation; Suggest ways s/he can help and take responsibility (care for themselves and their belongings); Remind your child of her/his strengths; Help your child to like themselves and feel proud; and Tell your child how much ...

When your adult child keeps asking for money? ›

It's often part of the process of them moving into a more independent phase of life. If your grown-up son or daughter keeps asking for money, the two most important factors for you to consider are setting boundaries and having good communication.

Why does my adult daughter treat me so badly? ›

There are many reasons why adult children can behave disrespectfully, including stress, childhood trauma, substance abuse, and mental health problems.

When should you stop financially supporting your child? ›

In order to decide when to cut the financial cord, ask yourself these questions: Are your adult children capable of supporting themselves? Have your children reached milestones in which they no longer need the same help anymore? Examples include graduating from college or getting a full-time job.

How do you say no to a parent asking for money? ›

Just say no, and stick to that one simple and final answer. DON'T EXPLAIN OR MAKE EXCUSES. When you say no, don't offer explanations or excuses.

When should I stop asking my parents for money? ›

If your parents' money isn't considered a part of your budgeting plan, then there's no need to ask for it. Your budget will also account for an emergency fund, so don't worry about slip-ups there.

What to do when your grown daughter hurts your feelings? ›

Instead of dwelling on the hurt, focus on finding constructive solutions. Collaborating with your grown child to address concerns strengthens your relationship and demonstrates commitment to resolving conflicts. Don't hesitate to seek support from trusted sources and prioritize self-care.

Does Maryland have emergency housing? ›

LifeStyles provides a continuum of emergency, transitional, and permanent housing services for Southern Maryland residents. Housing is provided in a structured environment, where activities such as chores, budgeting and life skills development are part of the program plan.

Does Texas have emergency housing? ›

The Emergency Housing Voucher (EHV) program is a tenant-based voucher program funded through the American Rescue Plan Act of 2021 (ARPA). ARPA was signed into law on March 11, 2021, and included funding for approximately 70,000 EHVs.

Does the US government give money to the homeless? ›

Many people experiencing homelessness are housed through rental assistance, vouchers and public housing. Outside of those mainstream programs, there are a number of federal programs that work to house people experiencing homelessness, directly or indirectly.

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