Why You Need to Break Up With Debt — JESS TINGLE (2024)

We’ve been told a series of lies our entire lives. You’ll always have a car payment. You can’t go to school without student loans. You have to have a credit card. You need a good credit score to get anything you want in life. These lies have become so mainstream that we believe them without even giving it another thought. We accept debt as a necessary part of life. We put on our shackles and stand in line behind the next guy. But it doesn’t have to be like that. You don’t have to live the rest of your life enslaved to debt.

What would life look like if you didn’t have any payments? All those paychecks that come in already earmarked to go to debt payments for purchase you made in the past? What if you were actually in control and could decide what you want to do rather than living by what you have to do? You could do anything you want. That’s financial freedom.

To Allow Compound Interest to Work In Your Favor

If you’ve been in debt, you know that compound interest can quickly stack up against you. But when you’re out of debt and you can actually plan ahead for putting money in savings, compound interest can work for you. And it’s beautiful when it’s working in your favor. Save for retirement, save for college, whatever your goals are you can just invest your money and watch it grow. You won’t find the freedom to save when your paycheck is already being spent towards debt.

To Change Your Family Tree

The best time you can start this process, is today. But the one thing I always hear (from both 75 year olds and from 25 year olds) is “I wish I knew this sooner” or “I wish I started this when I was younger.” But we can’t go back so the best thing you can do is start to change today and then influence the generations after you. What if your kids never had to fight to get out debt because they never went into debt in the first place? What if you could teach them money habits now that would set them up for success later in life? We can make life entirely different for the next generation, but it has to start with us.

To Reduce Stress

When your hands are tied to debt payments, it doesn’t leave much room for emergencies to come up. If something goes wrong with your vehicle, or someone gets ill, it can reap havoc in your finances. Debt freedom and an emergency fund eliminate the kind of stress that arises from emergency situations. It takes emergencies and turns them into inconveniences. Not to mention that living with no debt and creating a new budget every months means you’re telling your money to go, you know where it’s going, and you’re taking the steps to reach your goals!

To Make Different Life Choices

To be honest, the choices you make in regards to your life and career look a lot different when you don’t have any payments. When you’re finances are secure, you can afford to take risks in other areas of your life without everything spiraling out of control. Being financially secure will give you the confidence to try that thing you’ve always wanted to try, start that business, take the trip, you name it. There’s no limit to the changes you can make when you have no debt, a fully emergency fund, and a little nest egg.

To Give Outrageously

This is the one we get most excited about in our household. Living a life that is outrageously generous. When you don’t have any payments, you’re free to give money to people or causes as you feel led, when you feel led. You can help whoever you want when you’re not committed to making debt payments every paycheck. Leave a $1,000 tip, give someone your car, help the local church pay the mortgage, walk into a small business and make someone’s day. The list is endless. Giving is the most fun you’ll ever have with money.

If you’re ready to start paying off debt or you want further guidance in your pay off journey, get my completely FREE downloadable Debt Free Guide. This is a full guide of reading and prompts that gives you the steps to paying off debt in a bite sized format so that you can stop feeling overwhelmed and start feeling motivated!

Why You Need to Break Up With Debt — JESS TINGLE (2024)

FAQs

Is debt a reason to break up? ›

We all know that debt poses challenges, especially in a couple's relationship. Many people find themselves in a desperate financial situation or are one paycheck away from losing a relationship due to debt. Debt can be a source of stress in any relationship and a catalyst for breaking up.

Is it shallow to break up with someone because of future financial insecurity? ›

I say no, it is not shallow for someone to break up with you because of finances. I say, better now than down the line where it festers and become a problem. People need to be realistic when it comes to dating and finances, and it is an important factor.

Should you stay with someone in debt? ›

Pro tip: if your partner is honest with you and has plans to become debt-free, you may want to support him and stay the course. But, if your S.O. has no interest in changing his financial situation, it may be time to walk.

What to do if my boyfriend is poor? ›

What to Do if Your Partner Is Bad or Struggling with Money
  1. Focus on triggers.
  2. Lead by example.
  3. Accept their money problem and have open communication.
  4. Sit down and create a budget together.
  5. Say something before it's too late.
  6. Be a supportive partner and focus on improvement.
Dec 21, 2023

Can debt ruin a relationship? ›

The lack of financial health can be a major source of discord in a marriage or other relationship. The weight of mounting credit card debts and creditor calls can take a toll on any relationship. Individuals who are stuck in a financial rut may consider exploring bankruptcy as an option.

Should I marry a man with debt? ›

Understand how their debt can affect your future

This can also impact you both in case of a divorce down the road. One partner having student loan debt could delay or prevent you both from making life changes like getting a mortgage or starting a family.

Should you date someone who isn't financially stable? ›

No, many people find that money issues are a deal breaker.

If he's not financially stable and he shows no signs of changing his habits, take that into account when you're deciding whether or not to pursue a serious relationship with him.

Are finances a reason to end a relationship? ›

Love and money are often a volatile mix that makes or breaks a relationship, according to a survey from the Institute for Divorce Financial Analysts, with “money issues” being one of the leading causes of divorce.

Who is more likely to leave a relationship? ›

In fact, nearly 70 percent of divorces are initiated by women.

Is debt a red flag in a relationship? ›

Uncontrolled credit card debt, fueled by impulsive spending, is another financial red flag in a partner, according to relationship and personal finance experts.

What happens if I marry someone with a lot of debt? ›

Individual debt, including credit card accounts and loans, is in the name of one spouse only. That person is generally held solely responsible for repaying it, so the spouse whose name isn't on the debt is protected.

Should you marry someone with a lot of debt? ›

Discuss Debt Before Getting Married

For example, if only one of you is entering the marriage with debt, talk about whether the money to repay it will come from the joint household budget. Your partner may be okay helping out with repaying your debts, but if not, that's something you should know beforehand.

Can a man love you and not give you money? ›

A man who loves you will want to protect you and provide for you. But that doesn't necessarily mean money. Look for the other ways he does that, and let him know you appreciate his efforts and he makes you happy.

Can lack of money ruin a relationship? ›

Unfortunately, the exact thing that can be attractive to so many can also cause the end of a relationship. According to a survey from the Institute for Divorce Financial Analysts, “money issues” is the third leading cause of divorce — behind “basic incompatibility” and “infidelity”.

What is the broke bf hug? ›

The broke boyfriend hug is a TikTok trend. where a guy hugs his girlfriend from behind. when she pays for everything. This trend originated from the he got no money pose meme in 2019, highlighting the additional pressures women face in relationships.

How many marriages end because of debt? ›

Many married couples do things together like buy a home, start a family, and take vacations. These things all cost money, and of course, most of us don't have hundreds of thousands of dollars lying around.

Should debt be a deal breaker? ›

Debt doesn't have to be a deal breaker, Hanson said, but it is an option. "There are also going to be some clear indications that maybe your partner isn't ready... to address their debt in an effective way."

Is credit card debt a dealbreaker? ›

“When you think about the implications that are associated with credit card debt, like high interest rates, irresponsible spending, financial mismanagement, and a lack of self-control, it's easy to understand why this may be considered a deal breaker,” she said.

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