Strategies for overcoming a spouse's bad investment decisions (2024)

Dear Liz: I tell people we lost a huge chunk of money in the Great Recession, but it wasn’t the downturn that did us in. My husband made some incredibly poor choices. I’m embarrassed to admit that he absolutely refused to listen to me and stop the financial self-destruction until I grew a backbone. I told him I’d divorce him unless he stopped. He has mended his ways and we’re still together (which is really for the best; we’ve been married almost 47 years).

He’s now being very transparent and prudent about investing, but we’re still looking at an underfunded retirement and I’d like to maximize what we have. We’re both 71 and still working (we’re self employed). Our home is worth about $800,000 and we owe $160,000. We have a rental nearby with about $100,000 in equity that pays for itself, but there’s no extra income from it. We have $210,000 in investments and $25,000 in savings with no debt.

I think more real estate would be a good investment vehicle for us, but we’d have to cash out some of our limited portfolio in order to purchase more. So instead, I make an extra principal payment equal to half the regular mortgage payment on each of the properties each month. I’m not sure if that’s the wisest thing to do, but I figure it’s still investing in real estate and will help us when we finally retire, sell and downsize.

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Answer: Right now, the vast majority of your wealth is tied up in two properties in the same geographic area. A financial planner would want you to diversify, not double down by putting even more money into real estate.

And a fee-only financial planner is what you need to help you map out your future while easing the investment reins out of your husband’s hands. As we get older, we’re more vulnerable to fraud, exploitation and just plain bad choices. Your husband may have been scared straight for now, but he easily could make future decisions that could again imperil your finances. That’s especially true if his prior behavior was related to a gambling addiction. Not all problem gamblers choose casinos or horse tracks; some are day traders.

Given all that, you may want to consider purchasing a single premium immediate annuity when you retire. These annuities offer a guaranteed stream of income for life, in exchange for a lump sum. This would be income that can’t be lost to stock market downturns, real estate recessions, bad investments or fraud.

That’s something to discuss with your planner, along with ways you can use your businesses to maximize your retirement savings. (The self employed have many options, including a basic Simplified Employee Pension or SEP, solo 401(k) plans and traditional defined benefit pension plans.)

You can get referrals to fee-only planners at the National Assn. of Personal Financial Advisors, the XY Planning Network, the Alliance of Comprehensive Planners and the Garrett Planning Network.

Dear Liz: How can a timeshare owner get rid of the timeshare and claim the loss on taxes?

Answer: Timeshares typically are considered a personal asset, like a boat or a car, so the losses aren’t deductible. The best way out of a timeshare is often to give it back to the developer, if the developer will take it. You also could try to sell it on sites such as RedWeek and Timeshare Users Group. Unless your timeshare is at a high-end property, you are unlikely to recoup much and may have to pay the buyer’s maintenance fees for a year or two as an incentive.

Social Security spousal benefits

Dear Liz: I’m confused by Social Security benefits for divorced spouses, which you’ve written about recently. I was told that because I remarried (after age 60), I have to wait until my ex-husband died before receiving a part of his benefits. Is this still true for remarried ex-spouses? My ex does collect Social Security and I collect my small benefit (both of us started at full retirement age).

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Answer: Yes. Divorced spousal benefits would be available only if you are currently unmarried. Survivor benefits, on the other hand, could still be available if you remarried at 60 or older.

Spousal and divorced spousal benefits can be up to 50% of the worker’s benefit, while survivor and divorced survivor benefits can be up to 100%.

Liz Weston, Certified Financial Planner®, is a personal finance columnist for NerdWallet. Questions may be sent to her at 3940 Laurel Canyon, No. 238, Studio City, CA 91604, or by using the “Contact” form at asklizweston.com.

Strategies for overcoming a spouse's bad investment decisions (2024)

FAQs

How do you get over a bad investment decision? ›

"When you need to let an investment go, there is one simple question to ask yourself," he says. "Forgive yourself for any prior decisions, forget about the past and ask yourself this one question: 'If I woke up today with no investments, would I invest my money the same way it is today?'

How do you manage bad investments? ›

What to Do When You've Made a (Big) Bad Investment
  1. Accept Your Mistake to Prevent Further Sunk Cost. ...
  2. Focus on Protecting (or Rebuilding) Your Credit Score. ...
  3. Look for Downsizing Opportunities (e.g. Your Mortgage) ...
  4. Pick Out the Key Lessons to Learn from the Situation.
Jun 15, 2021

How do you pull out of a bad investment? ›

Here are some tips that will help you to get through a bad investment.
  1. You Can Learn From a Bad Investment. It is not just success that teaches. ...
  2. Find Out If It Is Possible to Recover Money. ...
  3. Document Your Loss. ...
  4. Learn When To Stop Analyzing. ...
  5. It's Time For Your Next Deal. ...
  6. Final Thoughts.
Jan 2, 2019

What are the three mistakes investors make? ›

Chasing performance, fear of missing out, and focusing on the negatives are three common mistakes many investors may make.

What is the biggest mistake an investor can make? ›

The worst mistakes are failing to set up a long-term plan, allowing emotion and fear to influence your decisions, and not diversifying a portfolio. Other mistakes include falling in love with a stock for the wrong reasons and trying to time the market.

When should you cut a bad investment? ›

The golden rule of stock investing dictates cutting your losses when they fall 10 percent from the price paid, but common wisdom just might be wrong. Instead, use some common sense to determine if it's time to hold or fold.

When should you pull out investments? ›

Investors might sell a stock if it's determined that other opportunities can earn a greater return. If an investor holds onto an underperforming stock or is lagging the overall market, it may be time to sell that stock and put the money to work in another investment.

How do you know when to pull out of an investment? ›

The investment is not reaching your goals – If you are no longer happy with the potential returns you can get, it may be time to sell. Or, if you find that the investment's risks have changed to more than what you are comfortable with, it's time to let it go.

What is the most successful investment strategy? ›

Buy and hold

A buy-and-hold strategy is a classic that's proven itself over and over. With this strategy you do exactly what the name suggests: you buy an investment and then hold it indefinitely. Ideally, you'll never sell the investment, but you should look to own it for at least three to five years.

What is the most common winning investment strategy? ›

Investment Strategy #1: Value Investing

They buy stocks that appear to be trading for less than what they're really worth. They're willing to bet that these stocks are being underestimated by the stock market and will bounce back over the long run. As those stocks grow in value, they turn a profit for the investor.

What is investment decision techniques? ›

Some of the methods used in making investment decisions include Net Present Value (NPV), Internal Rate of Return (IRR), Payback Period, Profitability Index, and Discounted Cash Flow (DCF).

Should I pull out of my investments to pay off debt? ›

So, if you're wondering whether to pay off debt or save for the future first, the answer is always pay off your debt. Investing while you're in debt is a zero-sum game. Any money you might earn from your investments is pretty much canceled out by the interest you're forced to pay on your debt.

Should I cash out my investments before a recession? ›

Bottom line. Moving your portfolio from stocks to cash is an understandable instinct when savings rates are high and there are concerns about a possible recession. But it's important to remember that stock market investments are part of your long-term plan, and selling could have tax implications.

Can an investor pull out of an investment? ›

Unless it's part of the agreement, an investor can take part in managing the business. Along the way of making business decisions, it is possible that both of you may not see eye to eye. And when irreconcilable differences occur, it may push the investor to exit from the business investment.

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