April 17, 2000 (Kentfield, Calif.) -- For all our fantasies of winning the lottery, sudden fortune can cause remarkable stress.
Therapist Stephen Goldbart, PhD, of Kentfield, Calif., says the newly rich "feel cut off from their friends and family. They're suspicious of investment counselors, afraid their kids will grow up spoiled or crippled by the money. And they suffer from an identity crisis because at the ripe old age of thirty-something they no longer have to go to work."
Goldbart and his partner Joan Di Furia, MFT, offer this advice for recognizing when money is getting you into trouble:
- You feel uncomfortably different from your friends and you're afraid to tell them how you feel about your new status.
- Being wealthy makes for more guilt than pleasure.
- Instead of feeling powerful and decisive, you feel paralyzed and unable to decide how to spend your money.
- You can't stand the envy of friends and acquaintances -- you find yourself becoming more isolated.
- You feel like you don't quite deserve the money and you can't believe it's really yours.
- You suffer from "ticker shock" and become obsessed with watching the stock market.
- You're afraid that you'll lose your money and your good fortune will simply vanish overnight.
(Compiled by Kentfield, Calif., therapists Stephen Goldbart, PhD, and Joan Di Furia, MFT, owners of the Money, Meaning, and Choices Institute).
Valerie Andrews has written for Intuition, HealthScout, and many other publications. She lives in Greenbrae, Calif.
As an expert in the field of psychology, particularly focusing on the impact of sudden wealth on individuals, I bring forth a wealth of knowledge and practical insights into the complex dynamics associated with newfound fortune. My extensive background allows me to delve into the nuances of how financial windfalls can lead to unexpected challenges and emotional turmoil.
The article from April 17, 2000, touches upon the psychological aspects of becoming suddenly rich, as discussed by therapists Stephen Goldbart, PhD, and Joan Di Furia, MFT, from Kentfield, Calif. The therapists highlight several key concepts that shed light on the emotional and psychological challenges faced by individuals who experience a sudden influx of wealth.
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Feeling Cut Off from Friends and Family:
- Goldbart observes that newly rich individuals often feel disconnected from their social circles. This alienation stems from the fear of being misunderstood or judged by friends and family who may not share the same financial status.
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Suspicion of Investment Counselors:
- There is a heightened sense of distrust towards financial advisors, indicating a difficulty in navigating the complexities of managing newfound wealth. This suspicion may arise from concerns about the authenticity of advice or potential exploitation.
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Concerns about Spoiling Children:
- The therapists note a fear among the wealthy about the impact of money on their children. There is an apprehension that the children might grow up spoiled or face challenges related to the family's financial status.
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Identity Crisis:
- A profound identity crisis is mentioned, particularly among those in their thirties who suddenly no longer need to work. This crisis arises from a fundamental shift in the individual's sense of purpose and self-worth tied to their occupation.
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Guilt and Paralysis:
- Being wealthy is described as causing more guilt than pleasure. Instead of feeling empowered, individuals may experience a sense of paralysis when confronted with decisions about how to spend their money.
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Isolation and Envy:
- The article highlights the isolation that can result from the envy of friends and acquaintances. The fear of being resented or treated differently may lead to increased social isolation.
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Imposter Syndrome:
- Feeling undeserving of the newfound wealth and disbelief that it is genuinely theirs is indicative of imposter syndrome. Individuals may struggle with the internal belief that they don't truly deserve their financial success.
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Stock Market Obsession and Fear of Loss:
- The concept of "ticker shock" reflects an obsessive focus on monitoring the stock market, indicating anxiety about the potential loss of wealth. There is a pervasive fear that the good fortune could disappear overnight.
The insights provided by therapists Goldbart and Di Furia offer a comprehensive understanding of the psychological challenges faced by those who experience sudden wealth, contributing to the broader discourse on the intersection of money and mental well-being.
