Rules for Gifting Money at a Wedding (2024)

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Rules for Gifting Money at a Wedding (1)

Today’s couple is less likely to want consumer goods as wedding gifts. Millennials are getting married at an older age, and have often established households prior to the wedding–whether that be on their own as individuals, or as a couple.

That means as you attend weddings, you’re more likely to catch a hint that the couple is looking for something else in lieu of that department store registry. That “something else” is cash.

Gifting money for a wedding can be a touchy subject, though.

How much do you give?

Do you make the check out to her maiden or married name?

Wait, is she even taking her fiance(e)’s last name?

How much money should I give as a wedding gift?

Many couples today have cash registries. You may get a URL in your wedding invitation. Once your on the site, there will likely be cutsie things you can “pay” for like the honeymoon suite, airline miles or dinner at a nice restaurant.

These are things the couple has likely already paid for, but it’s a polite way of asking you for cash.

These registries give you an idea of what is appropriate to spend in the couple’s eyes.

What’s the etiquette if there is no registry?

The old rule of thumb was to pay for your plate. Consider the venue, price point, and how much the couple paid to entertain you at the reception.

Generally, though, $100 is a good gift if you’re a family member or close friend. If you are bringing a large immediate family to the reception and have the means, giving up to $200 would not be inappropriate.

Co-workers can probably get away with less, but don’t dip below $50 if at all possible.

If your finances are tight, don’t overspend just to impress. If this is a good friend or family member, they’ll be grateful for the gift and understand your situation. If not, they might not be as good of a friend as you imagined.

When your money’s tight, check out their department store or other registry if they have one. Often there are smaller ticket items on there that look better wrapped up than a small-ish check. Fifty dollars is still a good threshold, but again, do what you can afford.

How to Write a Check as a Wedding Gift

Writing checks to and from couples is an aspect of personal finance that can be pretty confusing. Nine times out of ten a bank clerk, in person or remote, will let errors slide. But if you catch that one ultra-scrupulous teller, your check is worthless.

Unless the bride and groom are incredibly close with you, it can be tremendously uncomfortable for them to ask you to rewrite the check, making your gift null and void. Here’s a list of to-dos and to-don’ts to make sure everything goes smoothly.

Writing Checks to Newlyweds

Don’t:

  • Write “Mr. & Mrs. Smith.” You need to use first names. You don’t need to write any titles such as Mr., Mrs., Ms., etc.
  • Write “and.” For example, you shouldn’t write: “Mary and John Smith.” This is only appropriate if they have a joint bank account, and that’s most likely information you’re not privy to.
  • If it’s a check for a wedding, don’t write it out to the bride’s new name; she can’t change the name on her accounts until after the wedding, so this may delay or even prevent her from depositing the check. She may not even take her partners’ name at all.

Do:

  • Instead of writing “Mary and John Smith,” write “Mary orJohn Smith.” By writing “or,” either Mary or John can deposit it, regardless of whether they have joint or separate accounts.
  • Write checks out to the bride’s maiden name. You can include a note on the memo line to clarify the gift is for both of them if you feel it necessary.

Writing Checks from Couples

Don’t:

  • Print your name on the signature line.
  • Sign both your names on the signature line. It’sunnecessary, and is likely to get the check turned down at the bank when they try to cash it.

Do:

  • Sign your name. In cursive. Even if it looks like a six-year-old did it.
  • Sign ONLY ONE of your names. It doesn’t matter if you share a bank account or not. If you are trying to make it clear that the gift is from both of you, include a card with both your names on it. If you really want to emphasize the point, put something like “From Brooke and Nina” on the memo line.
Rules for Gifting Money at a Wedding (2024)

FAQs

Rules for Gifting Money at a Wedding? ›

You're welcome to give money as a wedding gift at any time. Often, couples would love to ask for money as a wedding gift but aren't sure how. Offering to give money toward their honeymoon fund, renovation project, or house deposit is a lovely wedding gift idea.

What are the guidelines for cash wedding gifts? ›

They suggest the following breakdown: coworkers or distant relatives should spend 50 to 75 dollars. Friends or relatives, 75 to 100 dollars. For close friends, family members, or if you're in the wedding party, you should spend 100 to 150 dollars—or more.

Is $100 enough for a wedding gift from a couple? ›

The etiquette suggests that the wedding gift amount for a guest can be about $50-100. Sisters and brothers, aunts, uncles, and nephews give $100-150. Is $100 enough for a wedding gift from a couple? Yes, it is pretty enough if you are not a mother of the bride or any other close relative.

How much money is acceptable as a wedding gift? ›

At the end of the day, it is still completely up to you. Gift the amount of money that you feel comfortable with - whether that's £10 or £500! The newlyweds are sure to appreciate the gesture, and the most important thing to them is that you were there.

Is $200 cash a good wedding gift? ›

Bottom line: There's no hard-and-fast rule on how much cash to give as a wedding gift. Wedding experts do, however, advise starting at $100. From there, you may want to adjust up to $500 based on factors such as your relationship with the couple, your budget and the cost of your attendance at the wedding.

What is wedding gift etiquette? ›

Punctuality plays a big role in proper wedding gift etiquette. Traditionally, guests have up to a year after the big day to send a gift. That said, many experts agree that guests should aim to get their presents delivered to the couple within three months of the big day.

What do you say when giving money as a gift? ›

"Include a note to the person that shows that you've given this some thought, and that there's meaning behind it," Swann says. "If they're an avid gardener or into sports, you could say, 'Here's to your next golf game,' or 'Here's a little something to help you as you expand your garden.

Is $2000 too much for a wedding gift? ›

Here's the tea: The average wedding gift cost varies, but it's usually around $100 to $150 per person or per couple. So, $2,000 is definitely on the high end, honey. But if you're super close to the couple and you can afford it without breaking the bank, then go for it!

Is $1000 a good wedding gift? ›

What is a good cash wedding gift amount for one person? If you're flying solo and just a casual friend of the bride or groom, then you can spend $75-$100 on your gift. Even if you're a super close friend of the couple, $500 is the most you should give. $2,000 might be too much.

Is $100 dollars a cheap wedding gift? ›

While clocking in a bit below the average price for a wedding gift, $100 is a perfectly fine amount of money to give for a wedding gift.

Is $500 an appropriate wedding gift? ›

"$250-$500. The amount should be at least enough to cover the cost of our attendance at the wedding. Amount goes up from $250 depending on how close we are with the couple. Money is the best gift ;)."

Is $300 a good wedding gift from a couple? ›

Upon consulting the experts, a wedding gift should range from $75 to $750—but most agree that $300+ is the sweet spot.

Is $300 a lot for a wedding gift? ›

Anyone who received a separate invitation from their parents to the wedding should give their own gift. Because a family gift tends to include more people, it is customary to be on the nicer end of the registry, spending in the $200 to $300 range, but, again, stick to what fits within your budget.

Is a wedding gift cash or check? ›

Exactly how to give money as a wedding gift is up to you. A wedding check or cash is always an option, though, nowadays, many couples have a cash registry, like The Knot Cash Funds, to accept money digitally, too.

How much should I give my son for his wedding? ›

Whatever you can afford. $250+ is a good starting point, but if you can't afford it, just give what you can. Originally Answered: How much money should I give my son for his wedding?

What does the groom's parents pay for in a wedding? ›

The groom's family traditionally paid for all costs associated with the rehearsal dinner and honeymoon, wedding day transportation, and the officiant. The groom paid for the bride's engagement ring, wedding ring, and groomsmen gifts. It is also common for the groom's family to pay for the alcohol at the reception.

Is $500 a good wedding gift? ›

"$250-$500. The amount should be at least enough to cover the cost of our attendance at the wedding. Amount goes up from $250 depending on how close we are with the couple. Money is the best gift ;)."

Is $300 a good wedding gift? ›

Anyone who received a separate invitation from their parents to the wedding should give their own gift. Because a family gift tends to include more people, it is customary to be on the nicer end of the registry, spending in the $200 to $300 range, but, again, stick to what fits within your budget.

Are cash wedding gifts taxable? ›

A: No! Under U.S. law, gifts aren't deductible. But they also aren't taxable to the giver except to the extent they exceed annual limits and lifetime caps. (The per-person limits for gifts that don't trigger filing requirements for 2023 and 2024 are $17,000 and $18,000, respectively.

What is the appropriate cash wedding gift if not attending? ›

Garringer advises spending as much as you would if you attended the wedding — which would mean around $100 for a close friend or $150 and up for an immediate family member. For more distant relations, a smaller gift is acceptable (or, as we mentioned earlier, a simple "Congratulations!" will do).

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