Prevent Financial Fallout: What to Do When a Loved One Unexpectedly Dies (2024)

It is hard to imagine something worse than losing someone you love without warning. Sudden or unexpected deaths are all too common, and the shock and pain of losing a parent, a spouse or anyone deeply entwined with your own life can leave you with a hundred questions that all feel like they need to be answered straight away.

Most pressing, you will want to know what to do next. If you have lost someone before their time, it is likely they may not have put their affairs in order or made any preparations for what happens when they pass away. In that terrible event, you will need to know what to do, not only for yourself and those still with you, but to honor the memory of someone who wouldn’t want you to have to struggle without them.

What to Do When a Loved One Unexpectedly Dies

The First Step

Within minutes after the loss of a loved one, you will have one of your first big decisions. What is to be done with the remains? If the death occurred in a hospital, doctors and nurses will initially handle the body, but they will ask you which funeral home you would like to transport the body out of the hospital. Hospitals will hold the body for a few days in their morgue, but after a standard 72 hours, they may begin charging fees. If the death occurs in a home, funeral homes will also be the ones to remove the body, which should be done as soon as possible.

Still, do not feel pressured to make a hasty decision. It is a sad fact that funerals are expensive and only growing in price, averaging at $7,848 in 2023. You should take time to call a funeral home directly and ask for pricing plans, as each step of the process, from picking the type of funeral, viewings, memorial services and other parts of a traditional funeral will have multiple options ranging in price.

If you’re feeling pressured to commit to a plan straight away, that is a clear sign you will want to choose a different home. Even within the timeframe of 72 hours to move the body, you will have a few days to prepare yourself and process your grief before making a decision.

Life Insurance

A little more than half of Americans hold life insurance policies, according to available statistics. If your loved one had you named as a beneficiary on their policy, it can be an invaluable resource to help cover the costs associated with death. If you know you are a beneficiary of a life insurance policy, the first thing you’ll need is a death certificate, which is a straightforward process.

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There are readily available guides online to show you how to access a death certificate in every state. You will have to pay a nominal fee that doesn’t cost more than $15 depending on the state, and, usually, it’s much less. Once you have a death certificate, you can begin the process of accessing a life insurance policy by calling the insurance company and speaking with an agent.

If you’re not sure if your loved one had life insurance, it’s worth looking into. Millions of dollars in life insurance policies go unclaimed every year from people being unaware a loved one had a policy. If you can’t find any definitive information or receipts of payment, online services exist to help you find a policy, such as the one provided by the National Association of Insurance Commissions.

Funeral Services

Once your loved one has been taken to a funeral home and you’ve had a few days to process, the funeral home director will set up a meeting with you to discuss how you and your family want to proceed. If your loved one passed away suddenly, then it is likely that you will have to decide the best way to honor their memory.

The first thing you should know is that the traditional burial and funeral service, complete with a viewing and casket, are among the most expensive options. These costs can be offset, as the funeral home will take you through each step and you can choose, for example, a less expensive coffin over a casket or a shorter viewing.

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Cremation, an increasingly popular alternative to burial, is far less expensive. Direct cremation, which is cremating the body without ceremony or viewing, is the least expensive of all, usually costing less than $1,100.

Other, less traditional methods of burial are also available. There has been a rising trend in what are known as natural, or green, burials. The body is not embalmed and allowed to decompose naturally in biodegradable caskets or shrouds, usually with a memorial tree planted in their honor. This is a time sensitive ceremony but does cost less than a traditional burial, usually costing between $2,000 and $4,000. The service also allows more personalization and involvement from loved ones as part of the grieving process.

Burials at sea have also grown in popularity, a process that can also involve a lot of customization and personalization. The price varies between as little as $200 for an unattended burial service to $2000 for an attended service at sea. This type of burial can also be done in addition with cremation.

No matter what you decide to do with the remains of your loved one, memorials and viewings can lead to additional costs, but you can find help. If your loved one or family are religious, your local church, synagogue or temple can help with a more affordable service.

Above all else, remember that a tragedy like this can bring the best out of the people around you. If the best way to honor your loved one is through a small, private gathering where friends and family come together, don’t feel pressured to do more than that.

Canceling Accounts

It’s an increasingly common problem in today’s world that sometimes we forget what online services or subscriptions we may be paying towards. Most of us have big online footprints; credit cards, accounts, online game profiles or streaming services all need to be closed. Especially if your loved one didn’t share their passwords with you, this can seem like a daunting headache of a task.

You may need to spend a couple of hours to a full day on the phone, but having the death certificate on hand will make this process much easier. If any service or company is proving difficult to deal with, there are step-by-step guides available on everplans.com to show you how to close accounts on over 230 of the most popular online services and companies.

How to Process Your Grief

It is a common saying that there is no wrong way to grieve. All of us will need to find our own way to come to terms that we have lost someone, but it can help to know that there are options that will not add to any financial burden left in the aftermath.

Griefshare is one such service, partnering with churches across the country to offer grief counseling. Usually they will offer it for free or at most a nominal fee of $20. While they are non-denominational and are welcoming to people of all faiths or no faith, it is important to note that they are based in Christian teachings.

There are many other resources for grief therapy that can be affordable. A good place to start is the funeral home you have chosen, as they will either offer their own service or have a list of available local services. These can be in the form of one-on-one sessions or group meetings, with group meetings being less expensive than personal sessions.

There are also lists of specialized therapy services, such as those related to the loss of a spouse or sibling. If you are eligible for Medicare, the cost of any grief therapy session can be covered as a mental health treatment.

The last thing to remember is that how you choose to mourn your loved one and how you grieve when they are gone is not going to perfectly match up with anyone else’s process. Mourning and honoring the life of a loved one is a complicated process, and taking it one step at a time will give you peace of mind and help you make the best choice for yourself and the loved ones still with you.

William Fewox has worked as a freelance writer since 2017, and his work is featured in literary magazines such as The Aquarian, The Navigator and The Historian. He has also self-published a handful of novels. He has worked as a Social Studies teacher and research assistant in local Florida museums and more recently has worked as an editor for a start-up publishing company. William holds a bachelor’s degree in history from Jacksonville University.

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Prevent Financial Fallout: What to Do When a Loved One Unexpectedly Dies (2024)

FAQs

How do you deal with sudden unexpected death? ›

Put off decisions that might have long-term consequences until you are able to think more clearly. Allow yourself to feel what may be painful emotions. If it helps to cry, let yourself cry. Pay attention to your emotions, and accept them as genuine reactions to your loss.

What is the hardest death to grieve? ›

Different kinds of bereavement

Important and among them is the relationship to the bereaved person and specific circ*mstances of the death. Several studies suggest that grief is most intense and difficult for people bereaved of a child or a life partner, and these are the people most likely to experience CG.

What is the most common cause of sudden unexpected death? ›

What causes SDS? Numerous known and unknown processes in the body can contribute to SDS. However, cardiovascular disease plays a major role overall. Sudden cardiac death (SCD) is the most common cause of SDS.

What to do if someone dies and owes you money? ›

When someone dies with an unpaid debt, it should be paid according to state probate laws, which usually means they are paid by the estate. If there's no estate or the estate can't pay, then the debt generally will not be paid.

Why you shouldn't always tell your bank when someone dies? ›

After notifying the bank, the account will be frozen, meaning nothing can be taken out or deposited. Amy says you will receive your loved one's death certificate within four to six weeks. She advises showing the certificate to the bank so you can work on accessing the funds.

When a family member dies who is financially responsible? ›

The executor — the person named in a will to carry out what it says after the person's death — is responsible for settling the deceased person's debts. If there's no will, the court may appoint an administrator, personal representative, or universal successor and give them the power to settle the affairs of the estate.

What not to say when someone dies unexpectedly? ›

At least he's in a better place; his suffering is over.” “At least she lived a long life, many people die young.” “She brought this on herself.” “Aren't you over him yet, he's been dead for a while now.”

What not to say when someone dies? ›

Your place is to console, not to judge. Acknowledge the person's loss and avoid saying things like “I'm glad it was you and not me.” Don't tell anyone what to do or to change his or her feelings. Don't ask anything of a bereaved person other then what you might be able to do to help.

What happens when someone dies unexpectedly? ›

The Police will arrange for a funeral director to collect the deceased and take the body into their care. If your loved one died while travelling to, or in, the hospital, they will be kept in the hospital mortuary. There will be experts on hand to inform close family immediately.

What debts are not forgiven at death? ›

Additional examples of unsecured debt include medical debt and most types of credit card debt. If you die with unsecured debt, repayment becomes the responsibility of your estate. Your legal estate refers to all the assets, property and money left behind by you or another deceased person when they die.

What not to do after a death in the family? ›

It is best to think of the decedent's belongings, paperwork, and assets as “frozen in time” on the date of death. No assets or belongings should be removed from their residence. Their vehicle(s) should not be driven. Nothing should be moved great distances, modified, or taken away.

What stops first when someone dies? ›

When someone dies, their heart stops and they stop breathing. Within a few minutes, their brain stops functioning and their skin starts to cool. At this point, they have died.

Is a sudden death a traumatic event? ›

Sudden bereavement is a type of trauma. Although it affects everyone differently there are common factors that influence a person's reaction: Whether or not the person was present at their loved one's death. If they were present, were they also injured or at threat of an injury.

What is the psychology of sudden death? ›

Emotional causes of sudden death. Other anecdotal accounts have supported the idea that extreme emotional states can result in markedly heightened autonomic nervous system activity that can lead to malignant ventricular arrhythmias followed by ventricular fibrillation.

How do people react to sudden death? ›

The most frequent immediate response following death, regardless of whether or not the loss was anticipated, is shock, numbness, and a sense of disbelief. Subjectively, survivors may feel like they are wrapped in a cocoon or blanket; to others, they may look as though they are holding up well.

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