How long should you wait for a reply? (2024)

Table of Contents
Dear eharmony, Dear Sarah, FAQs

Should you close a match if you don’t hear back from them? What is standard practice on an online dating site?

If you’ve been chatting to a match for a while and then they just disappear, should you give up on them? We investigate how long you should wait for a reply when online dating

Dear eharmony,

I have been chattingwith one of my matches. It’s been about a week since I last sent a messagebut I haven’t heard a thing. How long should I wait before ending all communication with them? How long does it generally take for a match to respond?

Sarah

Dear Sarah,

The speed of someone’s response will depend on their online dating site habits and their level of interest in a match. So, when communicating with a match it’s best to wait at least seven to ten days for a response. Failure to respond doesn’t necessarily spell a lack of interest. It could be down to work schedule or a holiday, so don’t take it personally.

How it works

Your search for a great relationship has never been easier with groundbreaking overhaul of the eharmony you know and trust.

To kick a match into action if you haven’t heard anything within that time frame, you can send a follow-up. They will receive an e-mail notice reminding them that you are waiting for a response. Again, wait another seven to ten days to hear back from them.

Another option is to simply be patient and consider leaving an unresponsive match open. Many happy eharmony couples tell us that their relationship began in this way, with one person sending communication and the other not replying for weeks, sometimes months. So don’t give up!

Take the experience of Mike and Katy. ‘It was up to me to send a reply,’ says Katy. ‘Mike was teeming with anticipation but was frustrated by my delayed response.’ Weeks went by with no change and Mike was so disillusioned that he chose to close the match. ‘I had been away on business, ironically 30 minutes away from where Mike was living, but I was so engulfed with a project, coupled with the lack of access to my personal computer that I was not able to reply until I returned home,’ she explains.

Thankfully, the pair eventually did start talking againe and a year after their first date, they were engaged. So don’t despair. Sometimes patience can reap rewards.

How long should you wait for a reply? (2024)

FAQs

How long should you wait for a reply? ›

Even though it's a little old-fashioned, some people will wait 3 days after a date to text you back to make you miss them more. Waiting any longer than a week could be a sign they're not interested, and it might be best to let the conversation die out.

How long is acceptable to wait for a reply? ›

Time-sensitive messages should be answered as soon as possible, while you have more time for nonurgent ones. But not that long. Gottsman, speaking "from a polite factor" believes you should respond within a day. "That sounds like a very long time for some people but we all have busy lives."

How many hours is too long to reply? ›

It depends on the situation and the people involved. If you're close friends or in a relationship, then 12 hours is probably not too long, as long as you're not doing it all the time. However, if you're getting to know someone or you're not sure how they feel about you, then 12 hours might be too long.

What is the longest you should wait before replying to an email? ›

What is the standard turnaround time to send a business email response? Short Answer: As fast as you can! Long Answer: I recommend at least within 24 hours (during business hours, of course) if at all possible. If you cannot respond quickly, send a note saying you will respond when you can do so in detail.

How long is too long left on read? ›

However, if your message is left on read for more than eight hours, then it might be time to start panicking.

Is it rude to ignore a text? ›

It's OK to ignore a text message, WhatsApp or a DM. Sometimes it's absolutely essential for your physical and mental health.

Why you shouldn t reply straight away? ›

In terms of texting, replying too soon (although great at first) over time can cause the other person to start to see you as less value. This results in the person having less of an urge to text you.

What is a dry text? ›

As a phrase, “dry texting” is relatively recent in the grand scheme of things. It refers to people who reply with one word, or don't carry the conversation and just say things like “lmao” and “wyd” until the receiver wants to tear their hair out in frustration or boredom.

Is it rude to respond to a text hours later? ›

It's definitely not rude to respond to a text message hours after you receive it. Lots of people don't have constant access to their phones because they're busy with the life right that's in front of them.

How do you deal with slow texters? ›

How to Deal with Dating a Bad Texter
  1. 1 Call them if you need a fast response.
  2. 2 Give them time to reply.
  3. 3 Cut back on how many messages you send.
  4. 4 Give them the benefit of the doubt.
  5. 5 Plan times where you can discuss things.
  6. 6 Save texting for casual conversations only.
  7. 7 Send them interesting messages.

What is the etiquette for text response time? ›

The appropriate response time also depends on what the text message is about. Time-sensitive messages need to be answered quickly while nonurgent ones can go longer without a response. However, in general, it's important to reply within 24–48 hours to avoid being rude and inconsiderate.

What is considered a fast reply? ›

A 5-minute response time is ideal, since it gives you time to think of an awesome reply that'll show off your personality and get her attention. But since you're not keeping her waiting too long, responding after a few minutes still lets you keep the conversation flowing.

Why do guys delay texting back? ›

But you shouldn't take it personally as there could be many reasons behind your guy not texting you back for extended periods. For instance, he might be busy at work or in the personal sphere, hoping that you would text him first, doesn't want to sound needy, or is simply not good with virtual communication.

Should I text again if no reply? ›

If you have given them the time to respond (at least 24 hours) and still hear nothing, sending a follow-up text can help clarify things.

What does it mean if a girl leaves you on read but responds later? ›

Millennials are constantly checking messages, Instagram, twitter, etc., so if we're left on read, it usually means our message isn't a priority to the person we're texting. If they're taking hours or days to get back to you, it says a lot about their level of interest in you.

Do guys like being left on read? ›

So, despite being a bit shady, both experts agreed that leaving someone on read can definitely work to make you seem more desirable — but it can be a mixed bag further down the line. Keegan explains that, as a seduction strategy, keeping someone on read can work. However, it can also appear like a red flag about you.

Is ignoring text toxic? ›

Ignoring or excluding someone activates the same receptors in the brain that trigger a pain response, both to physical and emotional pain, and leave lasting psychological scars, disfiguring your mental state, your self-esteem, and your ability to recognize a healthy, open relationship.

How long is it rude to not respond to a text? ›

Reply within 30–60 minutes to play it a little cool.

While it's okay to reply later if you're actually busy, purposefully waiting to text somebody might feel disrespectful if you're available. If you had to make the person wait for more than an hour, offer them an apology and explain what kept you from messaging them.

How do you respond when you are being ignored? ›

How to Keep Calm and Carry On When You Feel Ignored
  1. You can feel ignored without acting on it. ...
  2. Step 1: Recognize and validate your feelings. ...
  3. Step 2: Suspend Judgment. ...
  4. Step 3: Ask questions. ...
  5. Step 4: Work Together on a Solution. ...
  6. Step 5: Define Follow-Up.
Jan 6, 2020

Are fast replies a turn off? ›

Out of 132 people who participated, 89% (118 people) voted that texting back quickly is a TURN-ON and 11% (14 people) voted TURN-OFF. One voter let me know she tapped “off” by accident so these results are slightly skewed, but still—the results are clearly in favor of texting back fast being a turn on.

How do you follow up after no response to a text? ›

Following up after no response to an initial text

When you're following up on a text message for which there was no response, reinstate the subject of the previous message, so the receiver immediately knows what the text was about. End the text message with a question that remained unanswered after the previous text.

What is the power of no response? ›

No response means you have reached the point where you are in control of who you give your time and energy to.” Having the last word or constantly having a retort doesn't necessarily mean power. It could showcase a reach for power, but not necessarily a grasp on it.

What is cold texting? ›

Cold texting is reaching out via SMS to a contact without their prior consent or permission. It's similar to cold calling and cold emailing. Some examples that would lead to cold texting include: Purchasing a contact list from a third party. Finding customers' phone information online.

What is wet texting? ›

"Write Everything Twice" is yet another common definition for WET. WET. Definition: Write Everything Twice.

Is dry texting a red flag? ›

A text exchange with no emotion could be a red flag, she notes. If the texts are flat, with no smiling in the language and little energy, this might be an indication the date is emotionally aloof. Some people manage the anxiety of attachment by trying to control their environment, Winsberg points out.

What to do with late replies? ›

7 Ways to Politely Apologize for a Late Reply in English
  1. Sorry for the delay.
  2. Apologies for the delay.
  3. I apologize for the delay.
  4. Please excuse the delay.
  5. Please accept my apologies for the delay.
  6. Thank you for the reminder.
  7. Thank you for your patience.
  8. Want Someone to Correct Your Emails?
May 31, 2022

What is the unwritten rule of responding to messages? ›

Always respond.

Even if all you say is “got it,” reply so the sender doesn't have to wonder if the message went through. Technology has been known to fail us. To be polite, respond in a timely manner. 2.

Is it rude to take long to reply? ›

Yes, it's very rude. Because you are not listening to that person and don't even try to hide it (it's impossible to fully listen and text at the same time). Also because you are avoiding eye contact, which is rude by itself. It's like someone is talking to you and you are turning your head to the other side.

Are dry texters not interested? ›

Dry texting can mean that he's not super into you, but it could also mean you just have to change up your texting strategy a bit to get him interested enough to text back. We'll walk you through texts you can send to fix a dry text conversation, check his interest, and know when to leave the conversation.

Why is dry texting annoying? ›

In plenty of cases, dry texts are annoying simply because of the fact that they lack context, leaving you questioning what's really being said.

Why am I so bad at responding to texts? ›

It could be busyness (feeling overwhelmed with messages) or underlying anxieties that lead someone to be a bad replier,” she explains. “Sometimes it can also be about control – when we feel anxious and overwhelmed, we might try to take control of the situation i.e. 'It's up to me when I get back to someone'.

What is the 3 day rule for texting? ›

Popularized by the romcom, the three-day dating rule insists that a person wait three full days before contacting a potential suitor. A first-day text or call is too eager, a second-day contact seems planned, but three days is, somehow, the perfect amount of time.

What is considered rude texting? ›

Don't text anything confidential, private, or potentially embarrassing. Don't be upset if your text doesn't get an immediate response—you can't know for sure when the recipient will read the message. Think of texting as a conversation: If you would respond in the conversation, then respond in the text.

What does it mean when someone reads your message but doesn t reply? ›

By not answering or worse, by leaving you on read, this person may be sending you a message. They may not just be busy or forgetful, they may want you to get the picture without having to say anything. Yes, it is a coward's move, but it still happens.

What is the 24 hour text rule? ›

The next time you are “irked” by someone, instead of shooting off an emotionally charged text, give yourself 24 hours and then call them to talk through things in a calm, rational way. You will preserve your relationship and improve your verbal communication skills.

Do fast replies mean they like you? ›

Quick responses generally mean he likes you.

Longer messages, compliments, personal stories, and lots of questions mean he's looking to continue the conversation while shorter messages might mean he's not interested. Also, look at how consistently he responds quickly.

Is it better to respond fast or slow? ›

People feel more connected to those who respond quickly to them during conversation, according to research published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. The findings revealed that even third-party listeners felt that conversations with faster response times signaled stronger social connection.

How long is too long to respond to a text? ›

A General Rule of Thumb

A text should be answered within a couple of hours when there is not a time restraint. Keep in mind that if someone is working or exercising or basically out in the field, it may take longer for them to respond.

Should I worry if he hasn't texted me in 2 days? ›

If it has been less than a couple of days then try to not let his lack of contact bother you. There is a good chance he is busy and this is nothing to worry about. Get home from work, put your phone on aeroplane mode and avoid checking your WhatsApp status or social media activity.

Can a guy like you and not text you? ›

The guy may not be texting you every chance he gets free, but he may text you at least once in the day if he likes you. Just remember he has a life, a job, or maybe school and can't always text as often as you may be able to with your life. Just because he doesn't respond right away doesn't mean he's lost interest.

How long is too long to not hear from a guy? ›

Waiting 2–3 days or up to a week before reaching out gives him a chance to text you first once he realizes what he's missing. If you've waited more than a week and still haven't heard back from him, it might be time to move on.

Does not replying mean no? ›

No response isn't always a rejection. Sometimes, people have a perfectly genuine reason for not responding. Before you start to worry too much, bear in mind that they may simply be busy or at work and unable to respond just yet, even if they've managed to sneak a peek at your message.

Is double-texting a red flag? ›

Double-texting, or messaging two times before someone responds, is viewed as taboo in modern dating. While double-texting can feel bad, therapists say there is no rule for how much you should text. If you feel bad about double-texting, put your phone down and let the other person reply at their own pace.

What's worse being left on delivered or read? ›

Being left unopened is the worst. It's like the person didn't bother checking what you wrote to them. Being left on read tells you they were curious enough to read what you wrote but they ignored to reply back. Honestly, both are bad but when you think about being left undelivered it's wayyy worse.

Is she testing me by not replying? ›

She will test you by not texting back immediately or keeping from initiating a conversation. This is a sign that she wants to see your interest in talking to her. She wants to see if you are trying to reach out to her. Sometimes, she may play hard to get to see if you will stick around.

Will not texting a guy make him want you? ›

Spacing out conversations instead of texting all the time can build attraction, especially when first meeting someone. Sending more than 1 followup will not only make you seem desperate, but could also annoy the other person if they don't want to talk.

What is dry texting? ›

Close Settings. As a phrase, “dry texting” is relatively recent in the grand scheme of things. It refers to people who reply with one word, or don't carry the conversation and just say things like “lmao” and “wyd” until the receiver wants to tear their hair out in frustration or boredom.

Would a player text you everyday? ›

Is a player likely to text you every day? Most players won't text you every day. Players typically don't invest a ton of time into chasing someone—they've got too many girls to go after. Also, a player will usually have enough confidence to ask you out relatively quickly.

How long is too long to be left on read? ›

However, if your message is left on read for more than eight hours, then it might be time to start panicking.

Should you text again after no response? ›

If you have given them the time to respond (at least 24 hours) and still hear nothing, sending a follow-up text can help clarify things.

Why does he take long to respond but will keep the conversation going? ›

What does this mean? Either he is very busy or not interested in you anymore. If someone considers you important, they will respond irrespective of their busy schedule.

How long is it OK to be left on delivered? ›

For delivered, a MINIMUM of 24 hours should do the trick. Just do the mature thing and say something to the effect of “I need a cooling off period, let's talk once I'm less angry.” That will acknowledge that you're pissed and let them know to give you some space to cool off.

What is bad texting etiquette? ›

Don't text anything confidential, private, or potentially embarrassing. Don't be upset if your text doesn't get an immediate response—you can't know for sure when the recipient will read the message. Think of texting as a conversation: If you would respond in the conversation, then respond in the text.

What is the texting time rule? ›

Some people use their cell phone as an alarm clock, while others have a tone that goes off every time a text is received. To avoid waking someone up, don't text too early or late. “The rule is 7am to 9pm, but if you know the person well, you can probably push that range out a little bit,” says Post Senning.

How do you deal with no response? ›

What to do about a no-response response?
  1. Remember. Remind yourself that no response is a response (in most cases). ...
  2. Try to reach out again. One simple way to restart every conversation is to try reaching out again. ...
  3. Bring up a different topic. ...
  4. Ask for a convenient time. ...
  5. Know when to take a bow.
May 18, 2022

What to do after no response? ›

How to Write a Follow-Up Email After No Response
  1. Don't follow up too quickly.
  2. Ask yourself if you included a close in your first attempt.
  3. Resist the urge to re-send your first email.
  4. Write a truthful subject line.
  5. Start the message with a reminder of your last touchpoint.
May 25, 2023

How long should I wait to text if they haven't responded? ›

While waiting for 1 – 3 days is definitely good advice. It's not the only way to deal with an unresponsive lady. More important than timing is the content of your text. Say the right thing, and the conversation is back on track.

Is it normal for a guy to take days to reply? ›

Often, men take time to open up and respond in such cases. They might be interested in you, but they are simply being cautious and taking the time to respond and reciprocate. You need to be patient with them.

Is it worse to leave someone on delivered or read? ›

Being left unopened is the worst. It's like the person didn't bother checking what you wrote to them. Being left on read tells you they were curious enough to read what you wrote but they ignored to reply back. Honestly, both are bad but when you think about being left undelivered it's wayyy worse.

How do I stop waiting for texts? ›

An effective way of breaking a bad habit such as waiting for a text message is to become disinterested. There's one thing you must do to achieve it: be curious. Once you feel the overwhelming desire to look at your phone, stop for a second and observe every sensation and emotion you are feeling at the moment.

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