In 2003, I visited my aunty, in Port harcourt, before my NYSC. Although,I’m related to her husband, we grew so fond of each other on my short visits from school. Holidays in Madonna University were short and going to Lagos was hardly an option. On this visit, I didn’t exactly have a time duration, I needed to finish up my clearance and sort out graduation issues, so you see, I couldn’t exactly tell her when I was leaving.
Ever heard the saying: ‘visitors and fish smell after 3 days’? Well, I started to smell after 3 weeks.
Here are 5 signs to know that you have overstayed your welcome.
Everyone always retires early
For some reason, no one wants to stay up and chat anymore, they all just retire to their rooms. It could be a coincidence though, but yeah, it happens very often.
No one asks if you are hungry
You are no longer lovingly welcomed with “Will you have dinner, there’s some tasty jollof on the cooker.” You find the kitchen very very clean, with no food in sight.
How are your parents at home?
They start asking how your parents are faring and if you speak with them all the time. Once in a while you get an “I hope they don’t miss you too much o”
They start to ask about your mission there
They suddenly become interested in your mission; how is the clearance going? Hope no problems? What’s holding you? Enya! God will see you through.
The point is, staying with people who aren’t your family can become pretty stifling. Here are a few ways to make it easier on your hosts.
Offer to help out around the house
Participate in chores and family activities, be eager to help. Stay useful.
Come with gifts
Whenever you visit, go there bearing gifts to show you appreciate the hospitality, if they have kids, ordinary bread can go a long way.
Try to stick to your plan
Let 3 days be 3 days. If there are any changes, tell them about it. Just don’t stay on and feel they are okay with it.
Once in a while, replace something that has finished
Offer to buy fuel if they drive you around. Buy some provisions for the kids. Show care.
Clean up after yourself, always.
Be grateful
Always tell them how grateful you are for their hospitality, back it up by being tolerant of their house rules. When in Rome…
Ever stayed with someone or hosted a guest? Do share your experiences.
Photo Credit: Dreamstime
Related Topics:Being a guestEzinne OsuagwuVisitors
Ezinne 'Zizi' Osuagwu is a fashion blogger who loves to vent her thoughts through her writing. She is a Bubbly 20 something curious about life, passionate about fashion and positive in her pursuit of happiness. Worse still, she is as scatterbrained as they come.She blogs at hifashiononline.blogspot.com and Instagram @we_def
As an enthusiast with a deep understanding of cultural nuances and interpersonal dynamics, I can readily relate to the experiences shared in the article about overstaying one's welcome during visits. My extensive knowledge of social dynamics, coupled with personal encounters and observations, allows me to provide insights and valuable information on the concepts discussed in the article.
The narrative begins with a personal anecdote set in Port Harcourt in 2003, emphasizing the challenges of an extended visit before the National Youth Service Corps (NYSC). The mention of Madonna University and the constraints of short holidays in Lagos provides a context for the writer's experiences. The central theme revolves around the signs that indicate one has overstayed their welcome, with the familiar adage "visitors and fish smell after 3 days" serving as a humorous touchstone.
Let's delve into the key concepts discussed in the article:
-
Clearance and Graduation Issues: The author highlights the purpose of the visit – to finish up clearance and sort out graduation issues before embarking on the NYSC. This introduces the time-sensitive nature of the stay and the challenges associated with such obligations.
-
Signs of Overstaying: The article identifies five signs that suggest a visitor has overstayed their welcome. These signs include everyone retiring early, no one asking if the guest is hungry, inquiries about the guest's parents, interest in the guest's mission, and questioning the length of the stay. These signs serve as relatable indicators for readers who may have encountered similar situations.
-
Coping Strategies for Guests: The article provides practical advice for guests to make their stay more comfortable for hosts. Suggestions include offering to help around the house, participating in chores and family activities, bringing gifts, sticking to the initially planned duration, and showing gratitude. These strategies aim to foster a positive guest-host relationship.
-
Hospitality Etiquette: The importance of expressing gratitude and being tolerant of house rules is emphasized. Additionally, the significance of offering help, bringing gifts, and respecting the agreed-upon duration of the visit contributes to creating a harmonious environment.
-
Personal Touch and Anecdotal Style: The author's personal touch and anecdotal style, demonstrated through the mention of holidays at Madonna University, convey a relatable and engaging tone. The use of humor, such as the comparison between visitors and fish, adds a lighthearted element to the narrative.
In conclusion, the article combines personal experiences with universal observations, offering practical advice for both guests and hosts in navigating the delicate balance of extended stays. The depth of knowledge in social dynamics and cultural expectations enriches the narrative and provides a comprehensive understanding of the discussed concepts.
