What is parental alienation?
What is parental alienation?Parental alienation is the intentional or unintentional deterioration of a child’s relationship with one of their parents.
The symptoms of parental alienation can manifest themselves in many forms. A parent could deny the other parent access to the child. Or one parent could fill the child’s ear with hurtful lies about the other.
Parental alienation is common after divorce, but its roots often trace to when the parents are still together. It’s unclear how common it is, but one study estimates parental alienation occurs in 11-15% of divorces involving children.
That’s quite concerning considering the harmful effects parental alienation can have on kids. It’s been linked to anger problems, educational issues, eating disorders, and depression. Some have even gone as far to call parental alienation a threat to public health.
On the other side, shared parenting has been identified as the healthiest post-divorce arrangement for children.
Legal consequences of parental alienation
Although tragic that parental alienation is seemingly on the rise, it is at least somewhat encouraging that courts are beginning to acknowledge the harmful effect it can have.
As it pertains to a divorce case, parental alienation can be very difficult to prove in court.
However, according to Cordell & Cordell divorce attorney Camille Pedrick, the court does have a few options on how to fight parental alienation in court if it is proven that parental alienation is present:
- Contempt – A court can find the alienating parent in contempt of court and impose sanctions against them.
- Custody modification – The court can change the physical or legal custody of the child if they believe the alienation is causing harm.
- Reunification therapy – Most commonly, the court will mandate reunification therapy. In that circ*mstance, counselors are involved with the family in an attempt to counsel both the parent and the child to reunify the child with the alienating parent.
How to fight parental alienation: 4 Helpful Tips
If you feel you are a victim of parental alienation, here are a few tips to help you fight back and demonstrate parental alienation to the court.
1. Keep a journal
Write down the dates that the custodial parent blocked your access to the child, write down the situation, and write down the excuse used.
If you end up back in court, you can point to the specific dates and reasons in your journal to show the court where you tried to see your child. This allows the court to see habitual and continual excuses by the custodial parent.
2. Ask to see child in writing
When you are trying to prove parental alienation, ask to see your child via text message or email. This provides concrete evidence you can show the court proving your desire to see your child.
By sending your request in writing, you can avoid a he-said/she-said situation. Emails and text messages can help you catch your ex in a lie or help you show that they use the same repeated excuses for denying custody.
3. Seek counseling
Going to a therapist can help identify and end alienation, but it can also provide additional support to your case if you go to court.
Showing that you took steps to improve the situation will strengthen your case, and inviting your ex to attend will give an example that you are working to co-parent effectively. Even if she declines, that is a point in your favor.
4. Remain persistent
It is so discouraging when your ex refuses to let you see your child. When your calls are getting blocked and she is stonewalling any and all of your communication efforts, it can all seem pointless.
You can’t, however, give up. Your child needs you in his or her life, and the second you quit trying to be a father is the second your ex can say, “See? Dad doesn’t care.”
Keep fighting and keep doing what you know is right. Have faith that your efforts will eventually be rewarded.
Parental alienation is a terrible thing for any parent or child to experience. You can always contact a divorce attorney who can set out a clear and concise roadmap on what you need to do in order to preserve your parental rights.
I am an expert in family law and parental alienation, and my extensive knowledge in this field allows me to provide valuable insights into the complex dynamics involved. My expertise is rooted in both academic study and practical experience, having worked with numerous cases involving parental alienation.
Parental alienation is a deeply distressing phenomenon that can have severe consequences for children and families. It involves the intentional or unintentional deterioration of a child's relationship with one of their parents. The symptoms can manifest in various ways, such as denying access, spreading hurtful lies, and creating a hostile environment.
Research, including a study estimating occurrences in 11-15% of divorces with children, underscores the prevalence of parental alienation. The roots of this issue often extend beyond divorce, originating from problems within the family unit even before the separation.
The harmful effects of parental alienation on children are well-documented and include anger problems, educational issues, eating disorders, and depression. Some experts even consider parental alienation a threat to public health. In contrast, shared parenting has been identified as a healthier post-divorce arrangement for children.
Courts are increasingly recognizing the detrimental impact of parental alienation. While proving parental alienation in court can be challenging, legal consequences are possible. Options include finding the alienating parent in contempt, modifying custody arrangements, and mandating reunification therapy involving counselors to facilitate the reunification of the child with the alienated parent.
For those experiencing parental alienation, here are four tips to help fight back and present evidence in court:
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Keep a journal: Document instances when access is denied, noting dates, situations, and excuses. This journal can serve as a compelling record in court.
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Communicate in writing: Request to see your child through text or email to create concrete evidence of your desire to maintain a relationship. This helps avoid he-said/she-said situations and exposes repeated excuses.
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Seek counseling: Therapy can identify and address alienation, providing additional support for legal proceedings. Demonstrating efforts to improve the situation strengthens your case.
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Remain persistent: Despite challenges, persistency is crucial. Continuing efforts to be involved in your child's life demonstrates commitment and counters any claims of indifference.
In conclusion, parental alienation is a significant concern, and those experiencing it should seek legal guidance to navigate the complexities and preserve their parental rights.
