12 Money Questions To Ask Before Marriage (2024)

12 Money Questions To Ask Before Marriage (1)

Finding the right partner for marriage is a very critical phase in one’s life. While searching for whom to tie the knot with, the most important thing you need to look out for is compatibility. You and your partner must be compatible in various areas, including finances. To find financial compatibility in your partner, there are certain money questions to ask before marriage.

Asking these questions is a brilliant way to assess your partner’s financial life, as well as the good or bad money habits they could have. If you fail to ask these money questions before marriage, you may regret ever walking your partner down the aisle.

This post explores some of the most crucial money questions to ask before tying the knot. There’s no denying that this would help you make the right marital decision for the sake of your finances.

Are Money Questions Necessary Before Marriage?

Money questions are necessary before marriage because they help you understand your partner’s financial state and relationships with money. But more importantly, asking these questions will give you insight into your partner’s money habits.

How To Talk About Money Before Marriage

Talking about finances with your partner before getting married is not something you should wrack your brain about. It’s just like every other normal premarital conversation like having a casual discussion about genotype, number of children you intend to raise, and choice of career.

When asking your partner money questions, please don’t make it look like you are being intrusive or interviewing them. They could feel a little bit threatened and decide not to open up completely about their financial life. Instead of being formal or sounding too curious, you should make your partner feel very comfortable around you while having the conversation.

To make it easier, you could decide to go on a date. Maybe a picnic, a dinner date, or a visit to the cinema. It should appear like every other romantic meeting, and by the time you start popping out the financial questions, you will likely get the answers you need. Your partner won’t be tensed and trying to conceal certain things from you.

Why You Need To Talk About Money Before Marriage

Talking about money before marriage by asking your partner the right financial questions is very important. Here are 5 reasons why you shouldn’t fail to do this:

  • Financial Compatibility

Occasionally, arguments concerning money can occur in a marriage. However, you can be on the safer side when you and your partner are financially compatible. To be financially compatible with your partner, you both must share the same values and principles when it comes to money.

For example, if you are someone who practice frugal living tips, your partner must not be a spendthrift. Your partner has to be comfortable with the idea of living below one’s means in order for you both to be financially compatible. Otherwise, you both would have to quarrel and have disagreements concerning money constantly.

  • Prevent Financial Crises In Marriage

Financial crises are one of the most common setbacks that can break a marriage. If you must avert this, you need to know the right money questions to ask before marriage. Don’t wait until after you tie the knot before seeing through your partner’s money mindset.

There will be severe financial crises if your partner doesn’t think it’s a good idea to save toward your children’s college fund, pay off credit card debt, or build an emergency fund. Whether your partner is the type who’s living paycheck to paycheck or someone who’s paying off student loans, you can find out if only you create time to talk about it.

  • Plan For Unborn Kids

Planning for your kids even before they are born is a good parenting trait. But this is not something you can easily do alone. It would help to get financial support and encouragement from your partner. However, if your partner is not financially equipped to plan for a child’s well-being, then that child’s future is uncertain. Get married to a partner who sees the value in paving the way for your unborn kids.

  • Peace Of Mind

Another reason why you should ask money questions before marriage is that you need to preserve your peace of mind. Have you wondered what it would be like if you have to quarrel with your partner due to credit card debt constantly, impulse purchases, and failed monthly budgets? You will lose your peace in the marriage if that happens.

Moreover, your mental health could be at stake. To protect your peace and avoid mental breakdown:

  • Make sure you thoroughly assess your partner’s financial life.
  • Ask all the questions you need.
  • Take your time to study their money habits and discover if they truly prioritize their finances.

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12 Money Questions To Ask Before Marriage

To find a partner that’s financially compatible with you, here are the questions you shouldn’t forget to ask:

1. What Is Your Attitude Towards Money?

Everyone has a different set of values and mindset regarding money. But sadly, some people have failed to develop the right attitude towards money, which can be traced to their upbringing.

For example, someone who grew up without understanding what it means to live frugally will definitely not know how to manage money in critical situations. You must ensure that your partner has the right attitude towards money. You both may not have exactly the same money habits, but you should have an improved money mindset at least.

2. What Are Your Financial Goals?

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This is one of the questions to ask about finance before marriage. The kind of financial goals you pursue go a long way in setting up your life for financial success or failure. It’s good to have financial goals on vacation or to buy a new car. But it’s more important to have financial goals that will improve your finances and increase your net worth.

Building a retirement fund, saving for a child’s college education, and making wise investments are some of the important financial goals your partner should have in mind. If you want to learn more about financial goal planning, here is a post that will teach you how to set financial goals in 6 simple steps.

3. What Is Your Career Plan?

What’s your partner’s choice of career presently and in the future? That’s one of the money questions to ask before marriage. You need to know if your partner’s choice of career is financially profitable.

Whatever your partner does to make a living should be good enough to support the family. But that’s not all. You should be able to support your partner in doing what they love to do. It will help them feel encouraged and motivated to do more.

4. How Do We Merge Our Finances?

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Some couples don’t see the need to merge their finances. But if this is something you care about, then it is one of the financial questions to ask before marriage. You need to know if the ownership of physical and financial assets in the marriage would be joint or single.

When there’s a merger, you can achieve more financial goals easily. Ideally, financial experts advise that a couple should have 3 main accounts – one for the husband, one for the wife, and the last one for both of them.

5. How Do You Plan To Get Prepared For Retirement?

This is part of the key money questions to ask before getting married. You must understand the plans your partner is making for retirement. You need to come together to develop the perfect investment strategy to support your retirement life.

This will require you to be a team, having visually the same money habits, the same financial goals, and the same mindset. You can’t build a future together if you and your partner don’t look in this direction.

6. How Much Debt Do You Have?

Millions of people across the United States are in debt. From student loans, mortgages, and even credit card debt, some people have to remit a certain amount of money to their creditors. As one of the most money questions to ask before marriage, this can save you from a lot of financial trouble when you get married.

If you marry a partner with so much debt, your finances will be precarious. This is because your partner won’t be contributing much to the family due to the debt that must be paid off.

On the other hand, you may also have to support paying off the debt, which will also affect your income. To prevent this, don’t tie the knot without knowing how much debt your partner has incurred.

7. Who Is Responsible For Paying The Bills?

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Of all the money questions to ask your partner before getting married, this one shouldn’t be disregarded. Knowing who foots the bills in a marriage is important. There could be problems if you’re the one person paying the bills. You could get tired and feel like you’re being used, especially when your partner has a steady income.

To prevent this, you need to share the expenses reasonably. You can be responsible for day-to-day expenses while your partner handles long-term investment and financial planning.

8. Did You Take Any Student Loans?

Most times, people spend up to 10 years paying off student loans, and that’s a long time to spend paying a debt. If you won’t be comfortable marrying someone who is committed to paying student loans, then this is one of the finance questions to ask before marriage. If your partner took any student loans, ask about the strategy they are employing to repay the debt.

If they have an actionable and effective strategy to pay off the debt, it means they are serious about having a stable financial life. It also shows that they would have a good credit score.

9. Would You Want To Spend Money On Education In The Future?

Even after college, some people might still be interested in furthering their education, especially if it would improve their career. If your partner wants to return to school in the future, that’s a cost you have to be prepared for. It would become a major financial goal you and your partner have to achieve. This may require you to increase your income and invest wisely.

By including this in your list of money questions to ask before marriage, you won’t be taken aback by your partner’s decision to get a new degree.

10. Do You Prefer Using Credit Cards Or Cash?

If you are someone who understands the importance of controlling one’s spending habits, this is one of the main questions to ask about money before marriage. You must know whether your soon-to-be spouse prefers using credit cards or cash.

One thing about purchasing items with credit cards is that you will be subjected to impulse buying – one of the habits you should never have if you want to grow your finances. Credit cards will also lead to debt, especially If you are a spendthrift.

However, if your partner uses only cash when shopping, chances are they are being frugal, which is a very good sign. Making purchases with cash is a logical way to reduce spendings and prevent impulse buying.

By the way, if you are struggling to clear your credit card balances due to overspending, here is an article that will teach you how to pay off your credit card debt faster.

11. Do You Have Any Savings?

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This is one of the money questions to ask your partner before marriage. Remember you’d have to spend money planning a wedding. If there are no savings, this would be very difficult. Even after having a beautiful marriage ceremony, you’d need money to start a new family. This is why you and your partner must have set up savings accounts long before marriage.

A monthly savings of $100 is pretty reasonable to get your savings account started. More importantly, ensure you find the right financial institution that will offer good investment returns on your savings annually.

12. How Many Kids Do You Want To Have?

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Your list of money questions to ask before marriage isn’t complete until you include this particular question. Asking about the number of kids your partner wants to have may seem unrelated to money or financial planning. However, this is much more important than most money questions to ask your fiance before marriage.

This is because raising a single child requires a lot of money. Your child needs good quality education, medical attention (when required), and a lot more. If you aren’t financially stable, you will be incapable of offering your child all these basics.

Hence, you and your partner should thoroughly discuss the number of children you want to raise, as well as how you intend to cater to their wellbeing.

Final Notes On Money Questions To Ask Before Marriage

Marriage is a beautiful union when you don’t have to constantly disagree with your partner over finances. That’s why you must be financially prepared before you decide to tie the knot.

Since you are now acquainted with the money questions to ask before marriage, you must have gained clarity concerning the financial qualities and values you need in a partner. Focusing on these values and qualities will enable you to get married to a partner with whom you’re financially compatible.

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12 Money Questions To Ask Before Marriage (8)

12 Money Questions To Ask Before Marriage (2024)

FAQs

What is a good amount of money to have before getting married? ›

Therefore, if you make $70,000 a year and your spouse makes $60,000, the experts advise that before getting married, you should both have $70,000 in savings.

How should money be split in a marriage? ›

Make a list of all your combined expenses: housing, taxes, insurance, utilities. Then talk salary. If you make $60,000 and your partner makes $40,000, then you should pay 60 percent of that total toward the shared expenses and your partner 40 percent.

What is the money given before marriage? ›

Just because you are married does not mean they are entitled to money you had prior to your marriage. California is a community property states, which means anything you earn after marriage is both of yours. There is an exception for any money received through inheritance or a non-marital gift.

What should be the financial situation before marriage? ›

Create a Budget Before Marriage

You'll also need to determine whether expenses will be split or shared moving forward. Each partner needs to be open about everything and clearly state what they're bringing into the marriage. Creating a combined balance sheet and budget is important.

Do you inherit your spouse's debt when you get married? ›

No, you don't. Any debts either spouse had before marriage remain their own responsibility, with one notable exception. If you cosign a loan for your significant other or open a joint account on a credit card before you officially tie the knot, you're both responsible for the debt after your marriage date.

Is $10000 a good budget for a wedding? ›

The average couple spent nearly $30,000 on their wedding in 2022. That can be an intimidating number when you only have ⅓ of that in your wedding piggy bank — $10,000. Still, 10k isn't hay, and you can totally plan an amazing wedding with that kind of budget.

What is financial infidelity in a marriage? ›

Financial infidelity occurs when one partner hides or misrepresents financial information from the other, such as keeping secret bank accounts or hiding purchases. It does not necessarily involve marital infidelity, though it can lead to divorce.

What is the 40 30 20 10 rule? ›

The most common way to use the 40-30-20-10 rule is to assign 40% of your income — after taxes — to necessities such as food and housing, 30% to discretionary spending, 20% to savings or paying off debt and 10% to charitable giving or meeting financial goals.

What is the 50-30-20 rule? ›

The 50-30-20 rule recommends putting 50% of your money toward needs, 30% toward wants, and 20% toward savings. The savings category also includes money you will need to realize your future goals.

Who traditionally pays for marriage? ›

Traditionally, the bride's family pays for the wedding, but that custom is rapidly changing. Couples are increasingly choosing to handle at least half of the wedding expenses on their own.

How do I protect myself financially from my spouse? ›

How Do I Protect Myself Financially From My Spouse During a...
  1. Create a Financial Plan for Your Divorce. ...
  2. Open Your Own Bank Account. ...
  3. Separate Your Debt. ...
  4. Monitor Your Credit Score. ...
  5. Take an Inventory of Your Assets. ...
  6. Review Your Retirement Accounts. ...
  7. Consider Mediation Before Litigation. ...
  8. Popular Family Law Articles.
Aug 9, 2023

Should you be financially stable before marriage? ›

A person should not marry for money, but money is an important part of life and should be a point of discussion prior to the wedding. Financial stability is helpful in any marriage. The mishandling of money is often cited as a reason for marital problems.

How should unmarried couples handle finances? ›

Often, couples find it helpful to have one joint account in which each person contributes a set amount each month that is used solely for paying shared expenses. Outline specifically all the shared expenses and those that you will be responsible for individually.

At what point in a relationship should you discuss finances? ›

A few months into a relationship, start talking about your own financial goals — things like retirement plans, home ownership, paying off debt — and ask about theirs.

How do most married couples do finances? ›

The All-in Model

This is perhaps the simplest form of married finances. Both partners pool all their money together in joint savings accounts and checking accounts. They also add each other to existing credit cards. This means shared savings, shared income, and shared debt.

Is $1000 enough for a wedding? ›

While these numbers are, admittedly, a lot, you can definitely have most of the elements of a traditional wedding for a $1,000 budget. You just need to be creative - and a little bit flexible.

Is $300 enough for a wedding? ›

Upon consulting the experts, a wedding gift should range from $75 to $750—but most agree that $300+ is the sweet spot.

Is $15 000 enough for a wedding? ›

If your budget is $15,000, you can still have an amazing wedding. With a $15,000 budget, the key is to keep the guest list to 50 people or fewer. Other ways to keep costs within your budget include sending invitations through email or choosing a venue's buffet package rather than a plated dinner.

Is $30,000 a good wedding budget? ›

Set your wedding budget

Nichols explains the best thing you can do when building your wedding budget is to have a realistic idea of the approximate costs. In a 2022 survey of 12,000 couples across the country, The Knot found the national average for a wedding is $30,000.

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